We are fighting for our marriage. We need to try something different.

Many couples are in the same boat you are. They are also fighting for our marriage with little success. It’s not uncommon to have things going well one day and then it all falls apart again To get above that you know to have a plan in mind that works. So where do you start?

People do change over time. Your spouse may have developed new priorities or found new interests as time went on. What you used to have in common may not be the same any more. If your paths have diverged you must adapt or the relationship will eventually fall apart.

So many couples live in the past and cling to the things that used to make them happy. Life is filled with change whether we want to accept it or not. The important thing is to re-invent yourself as the circumstances dictate and “go with the flow”. Swimming upstream is a tremendous waste of energy.

Another thing that happens is one person in the marriage has lost sight of the ultimate goal. Marriage has always been intended to be a life long commitment. Obviously, things don’t always work out that way. You know there is still hope when both of you are committed to make our marriage work again.

If you need some counseling be sure and get it. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Be honest about your own short comings and where you may have failed. If the other person is ready for that give them some time. Then gently remind them that your marriage is not going to make it unless they are willing to grow and change as well.

Last but not least, remember to be positive about your relationship as much as possible. All of us can look at the negative things and focus on them entirely. Help your mate see the good things that you had together. It’s amazing how easy it is to crowd out the negative things once you constantly focus on the positive things.

Over time, your relationship can survive and even bloom. Never throw in the towel. Make a commitment to stay together even when the situation seems hopeless. After all, is there really anything more important than fighting for our marriage when the chips are down?